Breakups. They're hard, and who likes them? They're draining and tough, but sometimes necessary. My good friend Kristin once taught me the beauty of the breakup, Well actually, I think I thought her the beauty of the Facebook breakup, and she taught me the beauty of the blog breakup. Unfortunately, I'm at a point in my life where a breakup is sadly necessary.
Dear John Mayer,
We've had many wonderful years together. I've listened to your music and learned your lyrics religiously. We've had good times where I found wisdom in your profound words; and let's be honest, you're pretty nice to look at. We've also had some bad times. I've stood by you when you cheated on me with Jennifer Love Hewitt, Jessica Simpson and Jennifer Aniston. I even stood by you when you talked so candidly about Jessica in that magazine. I didn't leave you when you never returned my one million tweets. We made it through all of these hard times, but the time has come for me to draw the line. Taylor Swift? Really? First of all, it kind of seems like you're a pedophile. Second, did you learn nothing from the whole Kanye West debacle. Swifty is America's sweetheart. I'm a little insulted and disgusted to be honest. I've given all I have to give to our relationship, and now it's time we part ways. Remember that I will always secretly love you. I just can't publicly defend you anymore.
All my love,